Hand To Hold
by Lethal Anxiety
Summary: Matthew Williams is a single father to his two children. He is completely alone and deeply wishes for comfort. However he soon meets a handsome albino who also is a single parent in need of some love. Sparks fly even more when they both realized their daughters are in the same class. PruCan.. All Human. Rated 'M'. All Human/Human Names
1. Chapter 1

_a.n/ : So this is my 'first' serious Hetalia fanfiction. I hope you readers enjoy ^^ this thought came up in a dream so I cannot wait to type it out._

_Also I need a beta for this story because my grammar sucks as well as my spelling skills. So I will need a lot of help. _

_One last thing, For now this has been rated 'M' for language, adult context, sex (in later chapters) and Yaoi. (aka boyxboy love) If you do not like then please do not bash what I like. So please refrain from flaming my reviews. However I do love reviews that help me learn from mistakes and seek feedback on how the story progresses. _

_Description:__ Matthew Williams is a single father to his two children. He is completely alone and deeply wishes for comfort. However he soon meets a handsome albino who also is a single parent in need of some love. Sparks fly even more when they both realized their daughters are in the same class. PruCan.. All Human.. Some story I came up of during a dream. Each chapter based off of different songs. _

_Pairings: _PruCan, USUK, Spamano.. the more ;)

_**ANYWAY **_

_**Disclaimer: I do not own Hetalia.. I know sad right? Oh well ^^ However I do own Parker and Amelia who are not tied or connected with the 'Hetalia' series.**_

_**BTW POV (Point Of View Is Matthew/Canada) **_

Chapter One:

Hold On Till May

**(Pierce The Veil=Hold On Till May) **

_ Blood… So much blood… Why is there so much blood? _Doctors rush into the room like ants on a picnic. There in the hospital bed lays my beautiful wife. __ Her face content with a soft loving smile, eye closed in a peaceful slumber. However something in the pit of my stomach told me that I knew all too well what the outcome will be.

Machines beep in a fast pace almost matching the beat of my heart. This is a cruel dream right? A horrible nightmare that is doing nothing but playing a hurtful, sorrowful, game… I could only stand motionless as all the color from Julian's face slip completely drained of life. Her body lay motionless the rise and fall of her chest long gone as the machines confirm my worst fears. _Gone… completely and utterly gone. _Tears cloud my vision threatening to make a tedious fall. How could I allow this to happen to her? What will become of our beautiful Parker or our new born son? Could we survive without her? The hospital scene before me slowly is dissolved into blackness the sound of an all too familiar 'beeping' pulling me out of my slumber.

Only a dream… A reminder of the day of my, beautiful, son's birth and the death of my wife Julian. Oh how I loved her so, however it has been two years since her death and she needs me to be strong for my-_our-_children.

Shutting off the annoying alarm clock back to 'dismiss' I reluctantly find myself climbing out of bed. Eww cold sweats no fun. Taking a quick look at the clock it only read _5:00am_ so luckily I still have time to hop in the shower, dress, make breakfast, wake the kids, and get Parker off and ready for her first day of kindergarten.

After a quick shower to rid my body of its 'bed' smell I quickly dress in a dress shirt and pants for work and prepare waffles for breakfast. Finishing this sticky breakfast I set the table and climb the straight staircase up to the second floor. Once up the stairs I make my way to my daughter's _bright pink_ bedroom making my way to the curled up bundle hidden under the sheets.

"Sweetie.. Parker, It's time to wake up for your first day of school." I gently shake the bundle only to get a grumble in response. Oh dear.

"Come on dear you don't want to be late on your first day!" I attempt again.

"Yes I do!" The bundle squeaks in a high pitch, yet soft, voice.

"But I made you and your brother breakfast! Let's go eat before they get cold eh?" I smile pushing up my glasses higher up on the bridge of my nose. Op looks like that did the trick.

At the mention of breakfast Parker's head shoots out from under the blankets her bright, pale, blue eyes land on mind full of excitement.

"Really?" She asks rubbing her eyes with her little fist attempting to wake up more.

With a bigger smile on my face I nodded. "Yes only if you get up and out of bed!" I stand going to her dresser picking out her 'first day of school' outfit we picked out at the store the other day. With a little bit of patients I achieved helping her dressed and got her started on her breakfast.

"Slow down you are going to choke!" I sputter seeing Parker eating her waffle in large (big as a six year old could bite) pieces.

"Sorry daddy…" She says a soft blush rising on her cheeks.

"It is okay. Just be careful, I am going to go get your brother ready and then we will get going."

Nodding she continues to eat her breakfast as I once again climb up the stairs –boy these stairs are steep thank goodness for baby gates!- I go to the room right next to Parker's. Unlike her bright pink room, Brandon's room is a light blue. White clouds cover the wall adding some 'décor' to the crib placed in the middle of the room. There in the crib, a sleeping baby boy lays on his tummy his face completely serine. Hmm too bad he will have to wake up.

I gently pick up the baby boy propping him up so his head rest into the crook of my neck. By picking up Brandon, he gives a whimper of protest fussing a tad. With a sigh I run my free hand through Brandon's tuff of dark brown hair comfortingly.

" Shh.. Brandon… It's okay baby.. Good morning." I coo softly getting him dressed out of his pajama's and into a small, bright green, tee shirt and brown pants. Near the end he continues to fuss the sound of a gurgling stomach.

"Ah let's get something in that tummy of yours hmm?" I smile, his half lidded eyes staring up at me curiously. Those hazel eyes and full of wonder to an innocent child oh how he looks so much like his mother. Once back in the kitchen I cut up another waffle for Parker and have her finish up her breakfast while feeding the fussy child in my arms.

"Daddy? What wif ta other kid downt lwike me?"(1) Parker ask quiet the small little curl falling in her face as she avoids eye contact with me by staring into her lap.

"Parker I am positive the other kids will like you! Just be yourself and you will be just fine. I reassured her ruffling her hair in a comforting matter. Her eye meet mine, sparkling with hope and joy.

"Rweally?"

"Really really" I smile at her taking a quick look at the time. _6:30 am _the clock read. Already? Time sure flies. Placing the dishes into the kitchen sink- _crap looks like I will have to do that when I get home from work-_ I usher the six year old out to the car buckling her up in the back seat in a child booster seat and set Brandon next to her buckling him up in his car seat. After double checking that they are both buckled safely in their seats I 'fly' into the driver's seat of the rundown, silver, Toyota, and make a mad dash through traffic towards the elementary school just a few blocks away.

Through the rear view mirror I could easily see the nerves flashing through Parker's eyes as we arrive closer and closer to the school. Soon enough we made it into the school parking lot kids and their parents leading them to their classes while the older kids waved good-bye to their mothers heading in on their own. Getting out of the car I unbuckle to two kids, Brandon already fast asleep again, I take Parkers hand leading her into the large, maroon, brick building. With every step we take I can feel the death grip she has upon my hand nervously. Closer and closer, to the point eventually we stand in front of her teacher's classroom. The door, happened to be propped open so you could see and hear the other kids playing together.

"Okay Parker I hope you have a great day Mrs. Izzy will pick you up after school okay? She will come to this classroom so you do not wait outside. Love you." I kneel to her level smiling at her brushing her long blonde hair away up and out of her face. It almost hurt to leave, her wide blue eyes filled with fear and anxiety. Nodding holding her head up high she hugs me walking further into the colorful, welcoming, classroom clutching her little Barbie lunch box in tow.

"Hello~ I am Mrs. Smith and I am your child's kindergarten teacher! Pleasure to make your acquaintance." A middle aged woman with a very kind smile introduced herself while approaching me.

"O-Oh yes… Hello my name is Matthew Williams, Parker William's father. I am just making sure she gets to her class. She seems okay now though." I smile sneaking a quick glance over to my daughter playing with a few of the other kids on the other side of the room.

"Everything seems to be going smoothly Mr. Williams! She will have fun interacting with the other children just fine. I hope to see you and your wife at meet the teacher night Friday evening?" She calmly says her green eyes looking straight into mine as we talked.

Sorrow fills me in the pit of my stomach at the mention of the word 'wife' tugging at the bottom of my lip nervously lowering the volume of my voice so only Mrs. What's her name again? Smith was it? Yes Mrs. Smith! "Um a-about that Parker's mother passed away a year ago… It's still a touchy subject for her… Parker is so strong even though she grieves inside she attempts to go about the day without a care.." I say sullenly rocking Brandon gently in my arms now suddenly interested in my shoes rather than holding on to a conversation.

"Oh my! I am so sorry for your loss. Well um I will see you Friday then at meet the teacher night." She shuffles her feet as well her tone of voice dropping to match mine.

"Alright.. thank you Parker's baby sitter Miss. Elizaveta will be picking her up here after school since I will be working. Here's her number and mine just in case anything happens." I hand her the note cards with the information and with a last nod I take one last look over to my bubbling daughter, I let out a well needed sigh heading out the door back to the hall. Just as I rounded a corner my eyes widen as a pale figure with white hair accidently bump into Brandon and I out of nowhere. Thankfully the force was not enough to knock me off down.

_What in the world? Ugh that was close! But ugh I think I just twisted my ankle the wrong way it really hurts. Fuck. _

"I am sorry are you two okay? Oh I am so so sorry!" A rush mix of an unfamiliar voice engulfs my ears while my eyes refocus to a breath taking man with panicked red eyes staring into me looking for any sign of injury.

"Y-yeah I am alright… Oh Brandon shh it's okay" I recover rocking a now wailing Brandon his face flushed red as tears run down his plump little cheeks. Soon enough –Quicker than I'd thought- I look up my face warm flustered to see that the albino man still stood before me his hand holding a young child. Her hair long as silky rope, her eye-_red eye- _glancing back and forth between me and her father.- I am guessing? Wow he does not look that much older than I am…_Maybe even younger_? - Looking into his eyes something deep within me wanted to keep searching those pools of crimson.

It was then when someone clears their throat that I am released from this hypnotized state.

"Um w-well I am terribly sorry for running into you like that. That was seriously _**unawesome **_ I have to get my daughter to her class before we are even more late. See 'y-you!" The albino nods giving me a toothily grin. I nod my cheeks warm, my mind clouded making me completely forget about my ankle.

His voice… so smooth yet it has that ring to it… I lik- wait wait wait. Hold on there Mattie! What is with this all of a sudden! He's a dude! With a child! He probably is married or at _least _has a girl friend. Wait. Why am I thinking about a complete _stranger_ like this?

With a sigh as the stranger makes his way forward, his daughter in tow disappearing around the corner where Brandon and I came from. Could his daughter possibly be in same class as my Parker? Hm. No wait back on track. What in the world is wrong with me? With a long sigh, allowing air to refill my lungs, I continue on my way in a haze. Soon enough I drop off Brandon with Miss. Elizaveta, kissing the top of the small boy's head saying my goodbye while making my way to work. Luckily enough, I just made with little to no time to spare.

Sitting down in my small office, I stare at the manuscript to some clients work trying to get _his _face out of my mind.

It was just that those vivid eyes held mine and my emotion by a suspended string. Just waiting for someone to save him or looking for someone to save.

_Sigh _I am not getting anything done today.

**-End of chapter one! **

**Okay I hope it was okay to me it seemed a little short but I wanted to save the rest for the next chapter. So please excuse my grammar/spelling mistakes while I look for a beta to help me. . **

**I would gladly need a beta for this.. so if you are interested just PM me and we can figure something out from there~**

**Please let me know what you think by reviewing anon or not. **

**^^ Many loves **

**Lethal Anxiety ~**


	2. Chapter 2

**AN:/ Just a little note saying most of the chapters for 'Hand To Hold' will be in Matthew's (Canada's) point of view. **

**Chapter Two's title is based off of my favorite song that was covered by my favorite band.**

**Also kist a major thanks to the Reviews/Favorites/Follows! I am fortunate to have a new beta Zephyr Flyer who is patient enough to deal with my grammar and spelling mistakes! **

**Song:/ 'Iris' -Original (The Goo Goo Dolls) Covered by Sleeping With Sirens **

Chapter Two

'Iris'

Taking a seat in my black office chair I stare blankly down at the manuscript I held in my hands. Today, is definitely... Interesting. All that I am able to process are those _eyes_. Deep pools of red that I have _never_ seen before. With a load _'thud' _my forehead makes contact with the mahogany desk over and over again.

_'What is wrong with me? I feel like a prepubescent school girl. I have to focus!' _ With determination I forced my mind to rid its self of the red and open it to the task at hand. The lengthy manuscript sitting daintily in my line of vision.

On a normal day at Axis Publishing working begins right after I drop Brandon off at Miss Elizaveta's house and ends as soon as I get home. However when I am at work, it feels more like a time to look into someone else's mind for a change of pace. Even at the beginning I was nothing but an invisible newbie to this company. Now about four years later, here I am at the head of the editing team of the fiction department.

"Oh Matthieu~ You are sure acting differently. Are you sick? Or perhaps you are falling for another person?" Looking up, heat rising to my cheeks, I really wish Francis would just leave me alone like some of the others.

"O-f course not! I am not _falling_ for anyone. Now um if you will excuse me I have to get back to work.." Oh why am I cursed to stutter when I lie? _Wait but that is the truth! I am not falling for __**anyone! **_

"Really now? Oh well I just came by to ask if you wanted to come out drinking with Antonio and I. I have someone to introduce you to that I think you might hit off well with." Francis continued, coming closer only a desk separating us.

"Listen... Francis I know you want to help and all...but um I am not looking to date at the moment... With Parker going into Kindergarten and Brandon only being one.. I-I just do not think they would be ready for their father... M-Moving on." I sigh attempting to swallow a lump slowly forming in my throat. Now even thinking about it... Am I even ready to move on? Is it too soon? It feels so sudden.

"Mattieu... It's almost been a year... Juli was my sister and I know she would not be very happy if you didn't move on.. You need to be able to move on.. if not for her but for Parker and Brandon.. We will be at the Lotus on 89th ave. Friday night au revoir~" without even giving me a chance to reply, Francis was out of my office not even giving me-or anyone- a second glance.

I have not seen Francis this determined since when Juli and I first started dating. Boy, did he hate the fact that a close friend was dating his sister. However by the time the three of us graduated and Juli and I got engaged Francis finally opened up.

Work is really going to be like this all day? My mind consumed with the albino and Francis words? Well I guess I have a lot of effort into work today eh?

x.x.x

Before I even knew it the day passed by faster than I thought possible. It is only 6 o'clock but I am still getting home later than expected. Pulling up into the drive way my small Toyota was not occupying the spaces alone. There a silver Mazda was parked indicating Miss Elizaveta's presence.

_'Oh my god please don't have a frying pan.. PLEASE don't be mad at me' _I desperately prayed to myself hoping the Hungarian woman is in a good mood this evening.

"Daddy!" As soon as my footsteps through the door, a small six year old slams into me. Her arms latch at my legs as if life depends on it. I could feel the corners of my lips tugging up in to a small daughter as I prop my daughter up on my hip.

"Hey sweet pea! Hope you had a good day on your first day of school! Where is Miss Lizzy?" I ask ditching my coat and shoes by the coat rack entering farther into the house.

"In the kitchen!" an older, yet feminine voice replied back, the sound of sizzling and the smell of fish clouding my senses. Walking deeper down the hallway to the kitchen. One thing I loved the most about this house is the fact the kitchen looks right out to the play/living room area. I love this aspect even more on Sunday mornings when I am able to make homemade pancakes while Parker plays.

"Brandon look whose home! Daddy!" Elizaveta coos bouncing an alert Brandon on her hip. Brandon glanced into my direction his violet eyes widening and sparkling a wide smile glued on his baby face.

"Yep, I am home!" I coo supporting Brandon with one arm and Parker with the other.

"How was work? There were no problems picking up Parker today at school. However she did have to call Alfred about something that happened. Alfred asked if you could give him a call as soon as you had the time." She replied readjusting the frilly apron tied around her waist, turning back to the salmon that sizzled on the stove top.

"What happened at Parkers school?" I ask worriedly staring at the crazy woman as if she just said cows could lay eggs.

"...Well I do not know the whole story to tell you. Again I suggest you give your brother a call and figure out what happened." After that nothing was spoken between us as Elizaveta continues to cook dinner while I spend time with my children pondering what happened earlier today.

xxx

After the kids have been put down to bed and Elizaveta heading home I finish the dishes to my self debating on picking up the phone to answer the question burning in my mind... What happened today while I was at work? Was it _that_ bad?

Well might as well give my brother a call...

_" Yo! Sup Mattie? What can I do for you?"_ My brother's voice buzzed.

"Hey Alfred, I was wonderi-"

_"Look let's cut to the chase shall we? I was just about to call you about what happened today!" _ Why does it not surprise me that he cut me off? New record in fact.

"Yeah, about that what did happen today?" I sigh looking around the dimmed kitchen placing a sticky note on the current page of the manuscript on the table.

_"Okay so this is what up, so apparently some other kids where making fun of Ameilia's new friend. They were on the playground and the others began to mock Ameilia's red eyes and pushed her down. Then Parker stopped them pushing the leader of the group down. In the end I had to come down at lunch to talk to the teacher and the other child's parents. Nothing major both Parker and the other kid had to help clean the tables however." _ Parker pushing someone down? How unlike her. Well she was protecting this 'Amelia' but I have to talk to Parker in the morning...

Hearing about red eyes sparked up the memories of this morning, the man that ran into me in the halls with his child. Could this Ameilia be his child? Interesting.

"Okay thank you Alfred... I owe you one" Out of habit my fingers tangle in my hair.

_"It is okay, really. If you guys need anything you can always call! I am so proud of my little niece! She's starting to become a little hero like her favorite uncle!" _ Suddenly the conversation that I had with Francis popped up in my mind as I considered his offer. Maybe this won't be bad right? I could ask Alfred to watch Parker and Brandon for the night..

"Hey Alfred do you think ...um... that you and Arthur can do me a big favor?" Is this too soon to be meeting other people? It has been a year, but how will this play out?

_"Of course Mattie what do you need from the heroic me?" _ Alfred's voice sang into the receiver way to cheerful for this time of night. _11:30? Oh Maple. _

"Would you and Arthur be opposed to watching Parker and Brandon for Friday evening? After parent teacher night Francis wants me to catch up with him and some of his friends and have some drinks.." I ask already gnawing viciously on my bottom lip.

_"That is awesome broha! We can have the two sleep over Friday night! You need to get out of the house and explore the jungle man!" _ My brother is insane, however not quiet as insane as his partner Arthur. That fire of a brit changes his emotions faster then a PMSing chick. However, he is my brother in-law and has changed Alfred to a better person. He too adores the kids, especially Parker. Oh the tea-party pictures I have of those two are so cute.

"Thank you Alfred, really thank you. I will drop the two off later around 7 okay?" After exchanging good-bye's we both hung up the phone. What am I doing? Going to sleep indeed is the plan for tonight.

Well that was what I thought was what I was going to do climbing into bed. Yet when my eye fall closed it allowed red eyes of the man from the hall fall into my imagination. Man can it be Friday?

xxx

Nothing else occurred throughout the week leading up to Friday. Every day driving the icy streets of Chicago on the way to Parkers school she would be anxious to meet up with Ameilia. As soon as my foot made contact with the carpet of the living room my attention was taken by both her and her brothers needs.

They both are good kids always making each day filled with new experiences. Just like the time Parker was 12 months old and took her first steps.

Now Brandon is getting older, sooner or later it will be about time to when him off the bottle and he will be taking his first steps. Man time flies.

With the week flying by here I stand dressed in a white button up shirt and black slacks ready to meet Parker's Kindergarten teacher again.

"Daddy can we go in now? Please! Please! Please" Parker asked bouncing up and down her pigtails flying as she anxiously looks from me to the maroon building over and over again.

"Hold your horses! Yes we can go now.. Now hold my hand while we cross the street! Look for cars!" I reminded her grabbing her hand as I walk her to the side walk Brandon perched up on my hip.

"Can I show you my cubby? Oh and my desk?" Parker questioned pulling me through the crowd of other parents leading me down the hall to her classroom.

"You can show me anything let's just get there in one piece!" I chuckled attempting to keep up without bumping into any of the other hallway occupants.

"Okay we are here!" Pulling me and her brother further into the familiar room parents and other students fill the small classroom talking amongst themselves. A small whimper comes from my side as Brandon burys his face in the crook of my neck in attempt to hide himself from the people around us. Unlike his uncle and sister, Brandon is more like myself. Anxious around large groups of people, rather content with being around family instead.

"Parker!" A small voice yells over the sea of voices. A young girl, the same age as Parker, breaks through the crowd hugging Parker in a tight hug. The two giggled talking about different things. Looking closely this must be Ameilia. Those red eyes standing out of her features. Long blonde silver-ish hair framing her face in long loose curls.

Looking around me her father or mother cannot be seen in sight. Why would anyone leave their child unattended?

"Daddy! This is my friend Ameilia! Ameilia this is my daddy!" Parker beamed introducing me to her friend. I smile crouching down to their level- _Maple! I am getting old- _shaking her outstretched hand.

"Very nice to meet you Ameilia. This is Parkers little brother Brandon. Come on Brandon it is okay it's one of Parker's friends!" I smile ruffling Brandon's hair. With a little hesitant but Brandon turns his curious violet eyes to meet Ameilia's red ones only to quickly hide his face back into my neck.

"Don't worry he's just shy!" Parker beamed happily at her friend bouncing on the balls of her feet.

"Ameilia where are your pa-" I begin to ask only to be interrupted by the sight and sound of a certain albino.

"Ameilia you scared me! Don't run from me like that again! That is not awesome." The father scowls worriedly down at his daughter. Ameilia looks up at her father eyes wide as saucers.

"I-I am sorry!" She quickly apologizes hugging her father's leg

"Hallo my name is Gilbert Weillschmidt, Amelia's awesome father, nice to meet you." The Albi-Gilbert introduced his hand out stretched towards me awaiting for a handshake. Mentally cursing to my self I shake his hand smiling nervously.

"Hello I am Matthew Williams, Parkers father. Looks like our daughters became close friends." I smile lovingly at Parker ruffling her hair as a blush slowly rising to her cheeks.

"It's very awesome to meet you. I accidently have been bringing Ameilia to school late so I have not ran into you again. Kesesese" _Oh my maple his laugh! Snap out of it!_ I am pretty sure red is invading my cheeks by the way his red eyes gleaming and smirk deepening.

"Anyway Ameilia has been asking for me to ask 'Parkers daddy' if it would be okay to set up some uh.. playdates. I was uh thinking the park or something awesome..." Gilbert asked a discreet blush under his pail cheeks scratching the back of his neck.

"O-Oh um we will have to check dates. On most weekends that would be okay since I work on the weekends." I nod smiling as Parker squealed at my side with excitement.

"Alright! We should trade numbers so we can set something up!" He smiles ruffling his daughter's hair affectionately.

"Yes that sounds good!" I smile a bit taking out my cell phone trading contact information with him while our daughters talk and Brandon still propped up.

"And who is this little guy?" Gilbert cooed smiling coming closer looking at Brandon. However with the sudden close proximity it caused a sudden hitch in my breathing pattern. _Maple the cologne he is wearing is radiating off of him.. Ugh really? Really Matthew? I have two kids I need to stop thinking like this. _

"U-uhm this is Brandon, Parkers younger brother. He is a little shy." I smile timidly bouncing the small boy in my arms.

"Ah I see, he will open up sooner or later I _**am **_ awesome." He smiles widely.

"_**Oui! **_ There you are Gilbert come on we have to go! We need to drop Ameilia off at Ludwig's and Feli's place." The next moment a familiar Spaniard came to stand next to the albino looking at me curiously.

"Oh sorry Antonio your right! Cruu- I am sorry Matthew I'll text you when I can to talk more! Come on Ameilia!" Gilbert insisted picking up a protesting Ameilia.

"B-bye nice meeting you!" I waved smiling watching the trio leave without giving me the chance to remember Antonio. I swear I recognize that face somewhere..

"Alright Parker why don't you show me around the classroom? Hmm?" I ask breaking out of my haze.

With an excited nod Parker grabs onto my free hand and proceeds to drag me throughout the colorful room. Every often she would stop pointing out small little things that happened throughout this weekend. Near the end Brandon finally emerged from my neck also looking around the room curiously.

By the time I received the chance to talk to Parker's teacher Parker's energy slowly began to drain more and more until I had to pick her up and balance her in one arm with Brandon still in the other.

"Okay let's get you two to Uncle Alfred and Uncle Arthur's house okay? I have to go meet some of daddy's friends. " Too tired to vocally reply back Parker just nods and yawns her eyes drooping down. With a small chuckle I kiss the top of hers and Brandon's head buckling up in their car seats driving into the city towards Arthur and Alfred's apartment. Thank goodness I brought their bags instead of running back to the house.

xxx

"Hey Mattie! You guys made it! Here let me take those bags!" Alfred practically hollered taking the back from my hands as I struggle to keep the two sleeping kids in my arms.

"Hush you git! Can't you see they are asleep!" Hissed his green eyes narrowing over to the load mouth that is my brother.

"Oh sorry Artie.. Mattie... Come on in." Alfred smiles a blush rising to his face closing the door behind me. Typical Alfred.

"Haha it's okay Alfred they sleep like rocks. Not even a large clap can wake these two." I chuckled sighing in relief laying Parker down in the guest bed tucking her in then laying Brandon in the extra crib in the same room.

"Yeah, that they do. So the frog is taking you out drinking? That bar you told us about-Lotus- is not too far from here. So if he so tries to put a bloody hand on you just call or come right over" Arthur hisses his eyes filling with anger thinking about Francis. Those two never got along so this is no surprise of those seething words.

"Will do! Thanks again for watching the kids I'll come by as soon as I can in the morning!" I nod heading out the door.

"Okay! Just be careful! Use a condom!" Alfred commented followed by a loud smack from Arthurs book making contact with what I presumed Alfred's head.

"Ow! Artie~"

"Shut it! Bye Matthew." Arthur nodded my brothers ear already in his hand. Oh better get out of here..

With a relieved exhale the door behind me closed I make my way down to the lobby and out to the parking garage.

Okay so Francis said 89th avenue right? Okay another block to go.

_Budump...Budump..Budu- _ Anxiousness flows fast through my veins the closer I get to 89th avenue. What type of person is Francis attempting to get me with? Should this be good or bad? Well I should find out soon cause there is the bar. A brightly lit neon sign 'Lotus' hung vibrant in the night.

Okay here I go.

Quickly finding a parking spot I make my way towards the entrance. So far, I could not point out Francis's car. However I do not consider it hard to miss with it being a rose red Chevy Cruze. Hm I must be a little bit early.

Entering the bar, it didn't seem too special to be considered one of the popular, local, bars. A normal bar with stools lined up next to each other, while booths and table take up the rest of the small spaces. By this time, what I can see most people have claimed a booth or table while some even leaned against the wall.

Noticing an empty bar stool I take the seat to wait, ordering a rum and coke while I await for Francis and his friends. As soon as the rum and coke was placed in front of me I immediately took a long gulp of it wincing a bit at the burn of the alcohol slithering down my throat. I am not innocent when it comes to drinking, however I am not an alcoholic. Taking a sip this time I rest my head in the palm of my hand, my elbow propped on top of the bar simply waiting.

I cannot believe I got Gilberts number even if it was merely to arrange playdates for our daughters. I cannot hope but feel something deep in the back of my mind there is more than what meets the eye for this albino. Something hidden behind those deep shades of crimson hiding pain, hurt, and now reassurance for which I inertly hope to explore one day.

_Sigh_. Again what is wrong with me? Why am I getting hung up higher than clothes on a clothing line? He must be straight he does have a daughter.. Even then, I too have two children and have had a wife for over eight years up till now. So what _is _wrong with me?

"Matthew?" That voice. _He's_ here? But how? No this is just a figment of my imagination. Right? Gulping down a lump in my throat I slowly turn my eyes up to meet Crimson.

Yep it's him

**So that is chapter two, pretty short however I am going to attempt to make the next chapter longer and juicer. I will only hint that the next chapter might conclude around the 'M' rating. **

**Hahaha. **

**Anyway thanks again to my awesome beta! Happy holidays to everyone :).**


	3. So Sorry

Dear lovely readers,

For the moment, Hand to Hold will be placed on hold. I read through the two chapters that I have posted and honestly I feel really bad at the poor grammar and some missed spelling mistakes. I also feel like my writing style has changed too much for me to finish it how it is.

But no fear! Hand to Hold will continue! But you as readers deserve the best and only the best so I am going to take my summer and use my time to rewrite these two chapters and get this ball rolling.

I hope you all understand and will be patient as I attempt to fix what I have failed.

Thank you 3

Sincerely,

Lethal Anxiety


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